My Labor Day with 250 Backwards Card Decks and 2 Forward Granddaughters

I hope you had a wonderful Labor Day weekend.  Thank you for every single one of you and the changes you make in the world.  I sat thinking of the many people who work every day and how invisible so many are.  Literally everything I touch is the product of someone else’s labor.  I am grateful.

Watch 2 minute Card Deck Video Here

On Labor Day, I sat on my living room floor surrounded by 250 packs of my new Best Conflict Conversation Cards: Workplace Edition.   The back card of every single deck was flipped backwards. My shrink-wrapped professional product had become a DIY disaster.  Believe it or not, I was not even remotely upset.  How many times does a project go smoothly and everything fall into place?   For me, never.  There are always problems to solve.

Enter my 6 and 7-year-old granddaughters.

As we created our assembly line - remove shrink wrap, flip card, repackage in plastic cases - something magical happened. They started reading the cards.

"Grammy, this one says, 'For every no, give a yes!' Like when Mom says no to ice cream but yes to fruit?"

This is why I created these cards. These aren't just workplace tools. They're life skills we all need, whether we're 7 or 70.

The Cards Were Born from a Belief

I am so excited about these cards.   I use conversation cards as a family game.  They’re always a big hit – even with the grandkids.   It’s amazing to me how people genuinely listen and share and connect with cards.   

I am going to the Tennessee SHRM conference as a speaker and a sponsor.  I wanted to bring something different with me, besides the branded pens and Best Conflict Solution Stress Balls.  Then it hit me!  Why not create Conflict Conversation Cards?  

We need conflict escalation prevention, not just intervention.

Every week, employees lose nearly 3 hours to unresolved conflict. In healthcare, where I've spent my career, those 3 hours compound into dangerous resentment, higher infection rates from incivility, and talented professionals walking away.

Your organization isn't in trouble because it has conflict. It's in trouble because people don't know how to resolve it.

Two Cards That Change Perspectives

Let me share two principles from the deck that transform perspectives immediately:

Card #12: "The Story I'm Telling Myself"

When someone doesn't respond to your email for three days, your brain writes a story: "They're ignoring me. They don't value my input. They're probably undermining my project."

The reality? They might be drowning in deadlines, dealing with a family crisis, or simply missed your message.

Starting with "The story I'm telling myself is..." creates instant vulnerability and openness. It acknowledges our assumptions while inviting truth.

Card #22: The 80-20 Rule (Emotional Bank Account)

John Gottman taught us that relationships need 80% positive interactions to sustain 20% negative ones. Your team is like a bank - you can't withdraw (criticize) from an empty account.

One ICU manager started tracking her "deposits" and "withdrawals" with each team member. Her revelation: "I was overdrawn with half my staff. No wonder they bristled at feedback."

From Setback to Setup

That printing error? It became three generations working together, talking about conflict resolution.  It will always touch me how the youngest opened and stacked the new plastic containers while the 7-year-old fetched the unwrapped card decks and turned the bottom card right side up.  They stayed with the process for the entire 90 minutes that it took to re-box the cards.   My partner did make a reference to child labor – it was a holiday, after all.  Yet the littles were more than thrilled with their ice-cream payment.

We even got to chat about some of the principles.

The setback became the setup for something greater - a reminder that these tools work because they're simple enough for children and sophisticated enough for executives.

The Bottom Line

One mediation session costs $200-500/hour. One employee turnover costs 21% of annual salary. These cards? $59.ROI: The first prevented escalation.

But this isn't really about ROI.

It's about teams channeling energy into their mission instead of managing personalities.

It's about psychological safety. When your team knows how to say "The story I'm telling myself is..." they stop walking on eggshells. They stop dreading Monday meetings. They start bringing their whole, creative selves to work.

It's about dignity. Everyone deserves to be heard, to have their emotions acknowledged, to work without fear of gossip or backstabbing. These cards teach us to see each other as humans first, colleagues second.

It's about the ripple effect. That manager who learns to build emotional bank accounts with her team?  She's teaching them to do the same with their direct reports. And they take it home to their families. One principle creates generational change.

It's about Tuesday mornings when instead of brewing resentment over yesterday's slight, your team member approaches with curiosity: "Hey, when you cut me off in the meeting, the story I'm telling myself is that you don't value my input. What was really going on?"

It's about retention that can't be measured - the conflicts that never escalate, the resignations never written, the talented people who stay because they finally have tools to navigate the inevitable friction of working closely with others.

What the Best Conflict Conversation Cards offer is a workplace culture shift:

• From teams that tolerate each other to teams that trust each other

• From "that's just how we've always done it" to "let's find a better way"

• From emotional exhaustion to emotional intelligence

• From surviving your workplace to thriving in it

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One card. One conversation. One breakthrough.

That's all it takes to start transforming your workplace culture.

Your Invitation

If you're attending SHRM or the Case Management Conference, find me. Mention this newsletter and get the special rate ($49 instead of $59) with code SHRM2025.

Better yet, let's have coffee and discuss your team's biggest conflict challenge. Book 15 minutes here: https://calendly.com/kim-best-conflict-solutions/discovery-call

Or simply reply to this newsletter: What's the one workplace conflict pattern you'd most like to change?

I value your feedback, so please let me know how they work for you!

Kind regards,

Kim

Kimberly Best, RN, MA Mediator | Conflict Navigator | Grandma who believes in the power of clear communication

P.S. Those backwards cards? They're all fixed now; thanks to the best assembly line workers I know. Sometimes our biggest mistakes become our best stories.

P.P.S. My granddaughter's favorite card? 'You can be FOR someone without being AGAINST someone else.' She immediately got it: 'Like I can want my friend to win at soccer without being mean to the other team!' Wisdom from a 7-year-old.