Every year I write a holiday conflict blog. I do it because I know that many people – myself included - are silently struggling with the approaching holidays - the family dynamics, the old wounds, the exhausting expectations. And every year, I hear from readers who tell me something in these posts helped them show up differently, helped them breathe a little easier, helped them remember they had choices. This year's approach is about the most powerful tool I know.

As both a former critical care nurse and a current conflict management specialist, I've learned that this tension isn't really about the behavior we're trying to change. It's about something deeper: the fundamental human need for choice and control over our own lives and often the issues that lay underneath.

Whether we're in the conflict or managing the conflict, anger is arguably the most misunderstood emotion in conflict situations. Rather...

I hold the belief that our life is our story and our story is our legacy. Mother's Day always brings me back to the story I've been...

I get asked about bullying so often in my conflict resolution practice. It's one of the most common contributors to workplace and...

Many conflicts aren't just about the topic at hand—they're about our very sense of self.

Fear creates decision-making tunnel vision. We begin to see only binary choices - stay or go, fight or flee, your way or my way, all or nothing. I've learned to listen for these indicators of fear-based thinking: when people present their situation as having only two options. "We either cut staff or go under." "We must either match our competitor's prices or lose our customers." "I have to either accept this proposal or walk away." “The person is a problem, so I must fire t

It’s not hard to see all people as people, if you look them in the eyes. It’s even less hard if you take the time to hear their story.

Effective, respectful communication, particularly when it isn’t easy, requires a toolbox full of skills most of us haven’t learned.

For many of us, the holiday season brings a complex mix of emotions that can be challenging to navigate. Here's what to remember.

In professional environments, conflict and anxiety often go hand-in-hand, creating a complex dynamic that affects both our performance and our ability to find effective solutions. When conflict arises, it naturally triggers feelings of anxiety as we worry about negative outcomes, potential damage to professional relationships, or rejection of ourselves and our ideas. This anxiety, in turn, can escalate the original conflict, creating a cycle where negative emotions and behav

The decision to engage in political discussions at work is a personal one, with potential far-reaching consequences for your professional relationships and work environment. Before initiating or participating in such conversations, it's a good idea to engage in honest self-reflection about your motives and expectations.

In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to overlook the power of truly listening and empathizing with another's perspective—especially in high-stress environments like healthcare. But here’s the thing: empathy isn’t just 'nice to have'; it’s essential for meaningful conflict resolution. Drawing from years of experience in mediating healthcare disputes, I’ve found that when parties feel genuinely understood, defenses lower and pathways to resolution become clear. It transforms ten

We say that conflict is normal. Anger is normal too, and it's often the byproduct of unresolved conflict. But here's what most people miss: anger itself isn't the problem. It's a signal that something important needs attention. I’ve seen a lot of people have a lot of shame around anger. While it is not OK to hurt ourselves or others when angry, anger is a normal emotion with information to share.